Personal growth doesn't happen without  introspection and contemplation. They are both great ways to start to question our thinking, begin considering abstract concepts like Uncertainty and Impermanence, and to practice mental flexibility. It was only when I loosened my mental reliance on what is 'known', that I was able to fully engage my creative brain and access a different source of drive.  So, first work on thought flexibility and self acceptance. Over time, you'll find that you can ease this flexibility and acceptance into your relationship practices as well.